These need to be seen to be believed.
Photo Credit: Sonny Abesamis
MOST of these are real. See if you can spot the few joke ones, and mention your picks in the comments.
1) âAttached is a copy of my CV and his death certificateâ
2) âI have brave fight to wild bearâ
3) âI am only 6â
4) Reason for leaving: âIt suckedâ
5) âkount money faster than a bank tellerâ
6) âi like kids and its fun to fiddle with themâ
7) âI wonât waste your time⊠feeding you a line of crapâ
8) âIf you have any questions, please feel free to f#$king contact meâ
9) âit would be the highest choice of my smile to discuss myself being hiredâ
10) âPlease explain your rationale for the rainbowâ
11) Please tell me why you deserve to be hired: âTo be paidâ
12) âYou need me to work you because you seem to have trouble with mathâ
13) âlets make it happen WOO WOOâ
14) âPlease realize that Iâm not a braggart or conceitedâ
15) âcalling our head of HR a âskank hoâ does not gain you any plus pointsâ
16) âMy middle name is Promptness. True story. Ask my momâ
17) âhereâs a good presentation that coverâs the basicsâ
18) âthis position sparked my interested becauseâŠâ
19) âI am your dog walker⊠I got a 1600 on my SATsâ
20) âMe also can fight for boxing like Tysonâ
21) âI am also very highly motivated, just show me the moneyâ
22) âI hate this guyâ
23) âIâm sick of writing these pedestrian cover letters, youâre sick of reading themâ
24) âI am 24 years old which is why I think this position is a great fit for meâ
25) âI received some feedback from the grandfather of a friendâ
26) âAnd like to write columns, blogs, reviews, articles and letter to the editorâ
27) âsince I moved here solely for career purposes, donât really have any friends yet⊠Iâm in a perfect position to make work my lifeâ
28) âright now studying in a Left leaning institutionâ
29) âthe only caveat IS I have to do this during non-working hoursâ
30) The most generic cover letter ever?
31) âit would probably explode from Cancer of the RAMâ
32) âI dont have any expereinceâ
33) Business Insider Sports Intern?
Bonus
34) Captain Americaâs cover letter
Wow. My dad found the letter I sent to DOZENS of casting directors during my junior year. Hilarious. #bestsummerever pic.twitter.com/9pyZxAVisk
â Chris Evans (@ChrisEvans) June 8, 2016
And the resume/headshot I sent along with it is BEYOND humiliating. Truly comical. Luckily it did somehow lead to an internship. #dumbluck
â Chris Evans (@ChrisEvans) June 8, 2016
35) âI am writing to you in regard to the position of boyfriendâ
ABC News: Worst cover letters
More funny cover letters and job applications
- Reverse Job Application
- Is this the worst cover letter ever?
- 7 Funniest Cover Letters
- 17 Funniest Cover Letters and Resumes
Question of the article
Whatâs the dumbest thing you ever wrote on a cover letter or job application? Tell us in the comments!
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